The holidays for us were wonderful. I think the thing that stands out the most for me is the togetherness we enjoyed as a family.
This year we decided that instead of bringing our two children who live most of the time in the Netherlands home to us in Georgia, we’d fly the six of us there to them and to the rest of the family. I didn’t know how we would afford it, but we knew it was important for us to get there. We missed our family and it is very difficult for Hans’ parents to travel to us. It had been seven years since I’d visited there, and Holden, age six, had never been. Though we have been very blessed that they have come to us a few times, it was time.
We had faith everything would work out and it did. Hans travels so much for work that we were actually able to get six tickets using his airline points. What a blessing!
We had cautioned the kids that this year there would be fewer Christmas presents and that we were being very careful financially so that we could afford this trip. Everyone was totally on board with that. Maybe especially the six year old which was so surprising as he’s never seen a toy or game that he doesn’t want. It was incredibly touching to listen to him in the months leading up to Christmas, saying we could use his money “I have more than $100!”, trying to manage his expectations “Maybe Santa will bring me two presents, but if he only brings me one, and you can’t get me anything, it’ll be alright”. So precious. I tried to assure him that even if we couldn’t get him as much as usual, Santa would probably bring him a few things and he’d get gifts from grandparents too. He was very focused on getting to the Netherlands to be with family, and the rest he recognized … was less important.
We asked Santa to come early, (which thankfully he did ; ) ), and we celebrated the big present opening part of Christmas here ahead of time. Each year the kids patiently wait for clothes and necessary things at this time of year so that there are lots of presents and opening time is a big deal. That is really for me I suppose, but I am thankful to be able to continue that tradition from my youth. They were thrilled, they were spoiled, and it was lovely.
But lovelier yet was the trip. We flew eight and a half hours to Germany where we rented a big van for the week. We stopped over at a special German Christmas Market to enjoy that experience and did some shopping and had lunch. Then we drove to the Netherlands where we picked up our son Jop and our daughter Simi, and we went “home” to Hans’ parents house, a 152 year old farm house complete with thatched roof (above).
Hans’ three sisters worked hard to prepare everything so lovingly for us. There were mattresses or beds for everyone! All eight of us fit nicely in the three upstairs rooms, with clean bedding, towels, and everything we needed including a table and chairs in the upstairs common area, which they’d brought over from one of their gardens, so the kids would have a place to play games when they wanted to get away from the adults.
Everyone was so welcoming. Everyone was so thoughtful and generous. They made us a welcome sign, they shopped for food ahead of time and just thought of everything! My father in law uses a walker, and my mother in law has had both of her legs amputated, but they get around remarkably well! We call my mother in law “Oma” for the children because it means grandma in Dutch, my father in law is “Opa” for grandfather. Oma can actually drive her electric wheel chair all over their village, to visit each of the two nearest daughters and their families, to go to church, to visit friends. And she does. Honestly she puts me to shame, they visit friends and play cards or go to parties every week. They socialize about a million times more than Hans and I and our legs work perfectly well!
A nursing agency comes four times per day to get Oma up and down from bed. A few days into our trip, one of the lovely nurses trained me how to help with some of this. (I have had what feels like several lifetimes of experience and decades ago I worked in a group home, so this care was very familiar to me.) I eagerly helped my mother in law when I could, and each time it brought tears to my eyes at what a privilege it was, how special, and how thankful I am for them. There were so many of these moments; Holden climbing on Opa’s lap every chance he got, a totally contented, happy smile on his face, the children playing cards with Oma every day, parties and gatherings each evening, in fact … everything felt like a wonderful, comfortable party.
It is so interesting to me that being in a huge group, very often with many, many people crammed in one room, even around one table, just felt calm, comforting, loving and wonderful. Hans’ parents, sisters, brother in laws, nieces and nephews are so accepting and warm. Even when Dutch was being spoken and Hans and others were having to translate for some of us, it was comfortable and lighthearted.
We did a lot of special things like going to an open air museum where the kids could see how life was a couple hundred years ago, outdoor ice skating on the square, and visiting a beautiful castle just a few miles away, but even when we weren’t doing any particularly special, I was overwhelmed with how generous they all were to spend the time with us, and so thankful to be able to be there.
It was my first Christmas in all of my forty five years not having the present-unwrapping extravaganza on Christmas morning. On Christmas Eve we gave gifts to Jop and Simi, Oma and Opa and then went to a beautiful mass in the village, which was of course said in Dutch. And following that, a big family gathering and feast in the hall across the street. It was very joyful for me to be able to give everyone little handmade gifts from our farm. Christmas Day was quiet and lovely and it being our sister Miriam’s birthday, we went to her home for dinner and she fed a massive crowd in her lovely home. Very special.
Of course, the trip was not without its challenges, eight and a half hour flight there, ten and a half back, and I really dislike flying so I couldn’t sleep a bit and that made it exhausting. And our thirteen year old son managed to come down with the stomach flu day two, which is a HUGE trigger for anxiety for me. I spent hours scrubbing every light switch and door knob, every device and every hand rail he could have come in contact with and worry, worry, worrying that someone else will get it. But thankfully, blessedly no one else did. I can picture challenges like the stomach flu as tests, like “Oh, you think you’re pretty Zen? How about now?” And I still fail. But maybe I improved for a moment or two and that is all I needed to do.
And we lost six beautiful baby chicks while we were gone. I think what happened is that I neglected to communicate well enough to our first, very experienced, farm sitter. And it was cold and they were young and only two of our eight babies made it. So that was hard and sad, but we are managing, and it’s part of having a farm.
Oh, and speaking of farms, that is one more beautiful memory that I have from our trip. I told Hans I’d really love to see a sheep farm while we were in the Netherlands and he spoke to his dad who arranged a lovely visit with their friends who have a gorgeous sheep farm and stunning sheep! I couldn’t believe that was really possible, and it was a dream come true. Joop and his wife Mimi graciously let Opa, Hans and I explore their farm, and patiently answered my million questions over coffee in their lovely home.
I can’t begin to say how helpful that information is to me, to be able to chat with an experienced shepherd (Hans had to translate) and learn from his decades of experience was such a blessing. And they truly took being gracious to a new height. I imagine less patient and Godly people would have become annoyed, but they just gave and gave of their knowledge. It was so lovely and humbling.
And now that the kids are back in school, and our beautiful time of togetherness over the Holidays is over, we are focused on the new beautiful things of this New Year.
Loving family, special moments shared together, I am aware that I am so blessed.
What moments of Togetherness did you get to enjoy this season? What Blessings are you most thankful for? May they be many and may they truly resonate with you!
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